Give thanks

It's been more than a week since results are out.

I'm happy (for a lack of better words to describe how I feel) the way things have turned out. Lots of people are disgruntled about their honours grading.

It's a huge relief not to be one of them, really. I've had my share of grouse during my Dip Ed days, and still have - if not for that si ang moh (in Huiyi's words, haha ...) supervisor and that stupid cooperating teacher whom I can't even remember her name, I would have been able to cross over and got my degree 2 years earlier, and need not fork out 12k cold hard cash just for the school fees alone. I'm confident that I would still have been able to get the honours I got today, two years ago, if not even better. Now, I don't even get to be considered for First Class because my darn practicum only had 'pass'. The comfort lies in me getting the same pay as a First Class although First Class obviously enjoys higher prestige. I need to remind myself that the pay bracket was my ultimate aim, not the prestige, now that I've gotten it. I wouldn't want God to take away something He has given because I've grown haughty.

It's with trepidation that I reopened the portal services to retrieve my final exam results. I'm so afraid that what I had seen earlier could be a mistake. I'm so worried that someone might call me up and tell me that there's been a mistake. I get really paranoid. I kept thinking if there's anything I could have missed out to verify that it's my result slip - the name, the number I punched in to gain access to the results etc. Up till now, I'm still worried that there might be a mistake.

In any case, I've laid my hand on what many would be envious of. I ought to feel grateful that I get to snag a degree in my lifetime, by the virtue of NIE.

There're quite a few 'shock' cases in which friends or people whom we deem 'good' or 'intelligent' or 'lots of As one' do not get a better honours. Sometimes it just makes you wonder how the system works ie. why people who get vastly different results get the same kinda grading.

But I'm really glad that this time, there's justice (although many would vehemently disagree). And my hard work paid off, finally.

I sent a few thank-you emails to a few tutors. I've always wanted to thank them but didn't do it during the term time because I didn't want to feel like I was buttering them up even though my conscience is clear. I'm really thankful to these tutors who had help me got this far in the ways they could. Actually, it's been my wish to thank those interviewers who granted me the job. If not, I would still have been stuck in my 'A' level position, drawing $1.3k gross per month, doing some reception duties, admin or clerical job. I wouldn't have been able to get Coco into the school she is in now either.

I'm really grateful. For the things that God has done in my life. For the events - bad and good - that took place to get me here. For the nice people who were there for me when I needed help. I can't ask for more.