Hell Hath No Fury Like a Mother Scorned

J,

This is R, William's wife.

I am writing to you because I have heard from William what you said about my daughter, Coco. According to him, you have said that she "looks like someone who will sleep around when she grows up".

I must let you know that I am very upset about what you said bcos you have made very serious allegations about my daughter's integrity and they are an insult to my daughter's modesty.

According to William, you came across my daughter's Facebook and viewed her pics on her Facebook.

Firstly, as you are not related to her in any way, I am concerned and have my reservations on why you would be interested to look at a teenage girl's pictures. I question the intentions behind that scrutinisation.

Secondly, since you do not know her personally, it is inappropriate and juvenile of you to make slandering comments about her. 

Thirdly, on what basis do you deduce that she would grow up to be someone who sleeps around?

As a father, William has failed in his duty to protect his daughter. As a friend to William, it is utterly uncalled for and totally out of place to caution him that his daughter might grow up to be a girl who sleeps around. It only suggests that you think poorly of your friend's parenting. You have not only insulted my daughter's integrity, you have also insulted William and me the mother. What you said speaks volumes of what you think of me and it makes one wonder what William has been telling you about me.

I have endured 16 years of my sisters' criticisms of how strict and lenient I have been with my daughter, but they are my families and they criticise my parenting out of love for my daughter. May I know in what capacity are you criticising my daughter? 

If you have an opinion about my daughter, you are welcome to have one. If you had meant well, you are welcome to share it with William and share how he could teach her better. If you had meant it to be a passing remark and it will not edify William or my daughter, it would have been better if you kept it to yourself. I do not see how telling William that his daughter looks like someone who will grow up to sleep around can be edifying. It is offensive and insulting. You have crossed the line. I am sure you would think your friend is being offensive and has crossed the line if he were to tell you your girlfriend looks like a slut who has slept around behind your back.

I am writing in the capacity of a mother who sees it necessary to protect the integrity of her daughter. William may laugh it off since she is not his biological daughter, or he is just a lousy father and husband who is incapable of protecting his wife and children, but I cannot take it lying down when someone has vindictively attacked my daughter like this. A jealous peer has spread untrue rumours about her and I can understand it when a 15-year-old girl does that. But I cannot understand the purpose it serves when a man nearing 40 speaks words of vindictive nature about a child more than 2 decades his junior.

Finally, I do not appreciate you judging my daughter and do not wish that you discuss my daughter with William ever again. 

Lastly, if you have not read or heard it, I would like to point you to this old adage: "If you have nothing nice to say, you should keep it to yourself."


J's reply:

I'm sorry that I said that and I take it back.