A fall

I fell down some steps yesterday morning when I was rushing to work.

It hurt so much I couldn't bring myself to stand up after I fell. A nice Malay lady tried to help me up but I just couldn't. The right knee hurt.

I guess when your life is on the down side, you would break down at the next thing that happens. I had wanted to go to the lawyer's the day before and he wouldn't let me. He came home just as I was about to go out and he stopped me physically, without being abusive. And he took away the kids' birth certs. He begged me not to divorce him so that Baby can have a complete family. And I've put the divorce matter on hold (again for the umpteenth time). I cried at the thought of how useless I've been and how hard my life has been when all I've ever asked for is a decent man for a husband, sitting right there on the ground of an MRT station, with tonnes of people walking past me, especially a particular secondary school's students.

Then I heard a child calling me.

It's like a wake-up call.

I stopped crying and picked myself up, after the pain wasn't so bad anymore.

Today, both knees present huge patches of bruises. They smart when I crawl on the bed.

Sometimes I wonder if it's the workplace, or rather, the location of the workplace. I've fell down twice since I'm posted here.

It makes me wonder if it's some kinda hint to ask me to leave. How many people fall down while going to work?

Yeah, perhaps it's just the paranoid me at work again.