Wednesday 18 August 2010

A Brave New World

I did a very brave thing today.

I decided to call it quits - all my grumblings about my workplace, all my grouses about the meaninglessness, inefficiencies, ineffectiveness of the type of work done and to be done. I opted for a posting where I choose the clusters of schools and allow the ministry to post me wherever it deems fit.

The clusters I chose are in the South region. I definitely have to travel, and after the train, have to take a bus, whichever school I am posted to.

...

I am scared at the prospect, but at the same time, I really don't want to remain in a financially-strapped school with the same demographics of children and parents after four schools.

Perhaps I have been very fortunate - to be posted to schools within a bus' or an MRT stop's distance. But I am not happy despite what matters to me alot ie. distance. I feel that I am ready to move on to another workplace.

Another reason to move on is because I haven't heard people from other schools doing works as ridiculous as mine. Like what I always say, it's not the amount of work, but the meaninglessness of work that bothers me.

I do enjoy the short distance that enables me to come home quickly to see my babies, but sometimes I feel that given a longer distance, I may be able to end my day earlier so that would level things up.

For now, my department boss is on maternity leave and so the stress level is down, but I know once she's back in action, I will be highly strung again, week after week, because the work she gives is so minute and so much it is scary to receive an email from her. An email from her does not mean a job to be done. It usually means a few things to be done at one go, at short notices. Although I've been meeting her deadlines, it doesn't mean I enjoy it.

By getting myself posted to somewhere South, I am actually hoping to compel myself to move house. I love this area of Singapore. It's a more civilised area in the North, but I do find that it is very inaccessible and far from Coco's school. I'd always hoped that we could move to somewhere nearer to her school before she hits P6 so that she doesn't need to wake up at such unearthly hour at least for a year. Truth be told, I've always felt very guilty for making her wake up at 5am every morning. I didn't even wake up at such a graveyard hour when I was her age. I struggled, and still do, to wake up at 6am in fact. If I never move, then let me experience the pain she experiences.

I have read a few stories about "What kind of person you are maketh the place you move to" ie. if you are polite and nice, the people at your new place will be likewise and vice versa. I really think that no matter which part of Singapore I move to, I'll probably like that place as well. Before I marry, I had moved house more than ten times. I'd liked a few of the places we lived in, but I've learnt not to be sentimental about them because ultimately, the next place would have its own advantages, although I seriously do think that East is better than North in many ways ie. the food, the accessibility, the short distance between each MRT station, and to some extent, probably the civilisation of the people even.

I can just hope that it'll really be a much better school that I get posted to, so that the distance is worth the travel.

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